Nobody is as afraid of being labelled as a failure as I am. I hate to fail, in all aspects of my life.
Whether it is my career or my personal life, I have always wanted to come out as a winner or at least be on the path of winning. It is my Chinese blood to emerge on top. However, realistically it is not possible. You know I love to always aim for win-win situations and solutions but sometimes you need to fail in order to learn.
Yes, I have failed before. Who hasn’t? But the difference is that I don’t brandish my failures proudly on my sleeve, instead, I wear my battle scars proudly. My battle scars represent what I managed to learn from the failures and how I came back from the rising ashes like a fire Phoenix.
As an employee, I was declined for a promotion that was right in front of me. Instead of feeling indignant over it, I surprised everyone by humbly asking the person who took the promotion from me, to give me advice. I saw what I was lacking, tried to make improvements in those areas by taking more projects and upgrading myself outside of work. The following year, I was offered the same promotion because I have shown passion, hunger and willingness to change.
As a freelancer, I do get clients who think my work is not up to their expectations. Instead of huffing in anger or crying in a corner, I clarified with them, combing through their details as long as they are willing to show me. These clients usually ended up being my best clients who give great ratings as I learned from them and apply what I have learned in their projects.
Clients who are willing to teach will almost always hire you the longest as long as you listen and apply.
As a daughter and a sister, I always felt I haven’t given enough time to my family. I failed to care enough or be there for them when they needed me. Whenever I’m back with them, I tried to allocate as much time I can to spend with them. As absence grows fonder because I’m not in the same country as them, it is easier to pick up where we left off the last time. They are much more forgiving because of the distance.
As a friend, I truly fail in that area because I’m seldom back and whenever I’m back, my time is mostly with my family. As much as possible, I meet up my friends but it is hard when the time is so limited. Instead of losing friendships, my friends have one by one come up to Kuala Lumpur to visit me and as a form of gratitude, I will set aside time to be their tour guide, showing them around, bringing them to savour good food.
As a mother, I am no longer afraid of failure. In fact, I have to set an example for my 8 months old daughter that failure is nothing to be fear of but to embrace it as a part of life, as a teaching tool to allow one matures.
There’s a saying in Mandarin “要跌倒才会长大。” It means only when you fall, you grow up.
She’s growing up fast. She used to fall on her back, bumped her head and cries for attention. She learned now to fall on her sides instead and roll onto her back.
Failure is nothing but a life learning tool if you don’t let the fear crippled you. Learn from failure and turn it around to benefit you. Now, please excuse me as I am going to learn how to fail in baking cookies.
Ps. My cookies bounce. I’m a total failure in that!
Do you fear failure? Have you failed before? Share with all of us and make us feel better that we are not alone in failing one thing or another.
Best things in life are meant to be shared, start spreading MiddleMe around, after all, sharing is caring.