I have a problem at the workplace. This colleague of mine has recently been transferred to my department and has been nonstop asking me out on dates.
Everyone in my department knows that I am happily engaged since last year and I have made it very clear to him this fact. I have turned him down several times and told him in his face I am not interested in going out with him. But he hasn’t back down once.
Last week, I had to work late in the office because I need to rush out a deadline. He actually stayed back and watched me from afar (he made sure I am aware of his presence) until I got the creeps and leave the workplace without completing my job. I have caught him following me outside of my office during lunch hour twice. Luckily, those times I wasn’t alone.
I don’t feel safe around him. He has been giving slanting looks. Now I try my best not to work late in the office and even asked my fiancé to fetch me from work from time to time.
What else do you think I should do? I don’t want to leave my job because of him.
Oh dear, you have a stalker in the midst. You need to report this to your supervisor and HR if you haven’t done so.
Another method is to reject him publicly in front of your colleagues instead in private. Make sure that your closest colleagues are aware of your situation and not let you be alone with him. Hopefully, this embarrassment will make him back away and not harass you further.
Nobody should feel unsafe in the workplace and more so, not to be harassed by any colleagues. Please do not hesitate to report upwards so someone (either your boss or the HR) can help to mitigate the situation. Make sure that both your boss and HR are aware that you will not hesitate to bring in the police if the harassment do not cease.
Depending on your company’s policy, he will either get a warning letter or even be transferred elsewhere. If anyone should leave their job, it should be him and not you. You don’t deserve this.
Meanwhile, do make sure you are never alone with him and always leave the office in groups. If possible, don’t stay in the office too late and bring any backlog work home so you can work in the safety of your home.
If need be, confide in your fiancé and your neighbours and asked them to help to keep an eye out for you. If he does confront you outside of your workplace, threaten to go to the police. If you still don’t feel safe, go ahead and log a police report. It’s better to err on the side than to risk your safety.
Be safe and take care.
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