Learning To Let Go Of Things Don’t Matter As Much As Your Sanity

Wow! That’s a mouthful piece of a title!

I learned to let go of trying to fix the title into something catchier. And perhaps shorter. As it goes, it doesn’t matter as much as the content that goes in this article.

Learning to let go is a skill I learned a long time ago. Particularly as a manager because you can fix things that are wrong but you can’t fix people. You can only motivate and inspire them so far (like bring the horse to the water) but you can’t really make them do things exactly the way you want. So letting go of the smaller instances actually save your blood boiling and your sanity.

Let’s explore some of the things that I learned to let go and perhaps after reading this, you’ll learn to let go some of the things that don’t matter as much so that you’ll lead a more peaceful and less angry life.

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Work-Life Balance

Let Go: Work That Is Imperfect

I can work until I drop dead on my desk only to be discovered by the cleaning lady wee hours in the morning and my work will not be perfect. You can only give it your best and even then, accept the fact that nothing is perfect and that’s the perfection in it. Learning to let go of the 100 marks will give you much peace that you have to learn to accept flaws in your work.

Can you improve those flaws? Yes. But not tonight, not right now but in time to come, you will. So let it go and go home to take some rest. Celebrate what you already have achieved so far.

Let Go: Colleagues That Won’t Listen

I know you’re trying to be nice. But some people just need some hard knocks in life before they realize your goodwill. That includes friends and family in your life too. So no point beating yourself over it when they clearly going straight for that hole, instead help them cushion the blow when it comes. And no “I told you so” speech either.

Let Go: Bosses That Don’t Take Your Advice

It’s their businesses and their profit margins that going to take the hit. Be prepared, however, to clear up their leftover mess. Bosses don’t always like to admit that you are right and sometimes they don’t share the overall picture with you. They might have their reasons for doing so. Instead of hitting constantly on the wall, try to hit on some exercises, it’ll do you so good to let out the steam.

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Freelancing Life Balance

Let Go: Nasty Freelancing Clients

There will always be nasty clients, whether you are working for a company or working for yourself. You just have to grit your teeth and get through it. Perhaps you will learn your lessons by choosing your clients carefully next time or even better, be so successful that you get to turn away clients that you don’t wish with work with anymore. I did turn away clients and I will do so even at the expense of extra income. Life is way too short to hang around clients who don’t appreciate your work.

Let Go: Non-Paying Freelancing Clients

Ahh… I really hate this kind of clients who take your work, don’t give feedback and run away from payment when you chase them. Some even turned around to snap at you that your work is not good enough to be paid when obviously they are publishing your work on their website (with minor changes to it). You can read here how to make sure your clients pay you or if the amount is too little, consider letting it go. My time is just too precious to bicker over a $10 project.

Let Go: Freelancing Clients Who Wants The Whole World For $1

These clients usually hadn’t been working with freelancers and treat freelancers as full-time employees. Sometimes I do educate them and let them know if you need my time to join in a discussion, you need to pay for it, not just the completion of the project. And I don’t just sit around my laptop waiting for your email to arrive with instructions. In fact, I move around a lot and that’s the beauty of freelancing. If you need me to sit and watch my fish tank screensaver from 9am to 6pm, please pay me per hour to do so.

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Motherhood Balance

Let Go: Dirty Laundry And Dishes

Whoever has a sparking meat house while juggling a baby, is having a maid around the house. When my baby is crying from the teething pain, I ain’t have time (or the energy) to deal with laundry or dirty dishes. Those can wait until tomorrow. And if you want your favorite mug for your coffee, you wash it. I gave up trying to make my house picture perfect like the movies, keeping my sanity together is more important. That and my baby happy.

Let Go: Bumps And Bruises

At the crawling and wobbling stage, babies fall. You can’t be there for every fall. I learned to forgive myself for every bruise and bump my little one collects as she thinks climbing on top of the coffee table is akin to climbing the Mount Everest. And learning to let go as she explores heights with fearless guts. I’m rearing an adventurer.

Let Go: Disheveled Look

A part of me is thankful that I don’t have to pull off a slick model like look to go to work in the morning. I can just stroll into my home office, one arm carrying the little one while lugging my laptop in my most comfortable track pants and baby drool infested tee. I’m no superstar mom and definitely don’t have to stand at the balcony to wave at my fans. While I do make effort if there’s an event, I’m quite willing to let go of I-must-look-pretty or I-must-have-my-makeup-on rules.

So what have you learned to let go? So to keep yourself sane and happy? Please do share with us in the comments below.

There are times letting go is hard, but you just have to grit your teeth and do it like I do it here:

Pick Your Battles

You Have A Choice!


 

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42 Comments Add yours

  1. ptkmkl says:

    Good night sweetheart 

    Sent from my Verizon, Samsung Galaxy smartphone

    Liked by 1 person

  2. thiaBasilia says:

    WOW! So timely! Been letting go of everything! I mean everything, but! Just now? I hung up the phone after blasting my Ahmad because my kitchen light went out and I need a light bulb now!

    I said, “I let go of everything but I AM NOT A GHOST! THERE ARE THINGS I HAVE TO HAVE!”

    I looked at my screen and? GOT ANGRY AT YOUR HEADLINE! BECAUSE I PRACTICE THE LET GO THING UNTIL THIS MORNING! AND HERE YOU COME TELLING TO LEARN TO LET GO? LOL I clicked anyhow, just in case I have missed something.

    So glad I clicked! My Father in the heavens knows exactly how to squash my lack of acceptance right when it pops its head! I’m gladly letting go of that stupid light for sure! lol lol lol!

    Much love forever, thia 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Kally says:

      Lol. You are so funny, my friend. I hope your world is lighted up again with light bulbs. Don’t ever walk or work in the dark. You are such an inspiration to me, Thia!

      By the way, I have a Niece that has the same name as you. Gorgeous name – Thia.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. thiaBasilia says:

    When I say ‘everything’? I mean including dirty dishes, dirty cloth, and dirty self! So intent and resolute I am into my writing task.

    My Heavenly Father said, “Let go of it all. Your assigned task is all that matters.” Finally? Father gave me the go ahead to look at myself in the mirror.

    O no! My hair! I let go of combing my hair! I looked like the ‘mad professor’. hahaha! That was my signal it was time to clean up just as I finished the graphic I am about to post today.

    Don’t miss it. It’s good! Let go of everything but don’t forget my thing. lol

    Much love, thia 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Great reminder Kally! We need to think of things that can wait versus what matters most. My dirty dishes, or my baby wanting to be held by mom. Because as they say, the days are long but the years are short – so true! 😊🙏🏽

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Kally says:

      Thank you, Chiari! It certainly is not easy with life if we don’t learn to let go on unimportant stuff. I don’t want to make myself miserable over a pile of dirty laundry!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I agree! I try not to be hard on myself. Living with chronic pain makes me slow down and see what’s more important, what things need to be done that are a priority to do. And I go from there.

        Liked by 2 people

        1. Kally says:

          We do what we have to do, as mommies. If we are hard on ourselves, our children will model after us. I may be a perfectionist but I don’t want my child to be one if she can help it.

          Liked by 1 person

        2. thiaBasilia says:

          Touche! We are sailing on the same boat of pain and distress, but! The Captain of the boat? He is there for sure! He’ll get us to our destination regardless all pain and misery in the turbulent waves of the sea of our lives.

          Much love, thia 🙂

          Liked by 2 people

          1. Awe! So incredibly sweet and very true! 😊🙏🏽 That is our driving force, our motivation, He’s there! He’s there even when we don’t believe He is, He’s always been there. The pain and struggles of life are bearable only because of Him. Through Him, all things are possible.
            Likewise Thia, 😊❣️ – Ana

            Liked by 2 people

          2. thiaBasilia says:

            Hahaha! HalleluYah!

            Liked by 2 people

          3. thiaBasilia says:

            I’m so delightfully busy right now. Guess why? I wrote it down in my journal. You want to read it?

            Liked by 2 people

          4. Yes, please, I’d love to.

            Liked by 2 people

          5. thiaBasilia says:

            Here it goes. It was written in reply to an email I send’s reply.

            THE MEANING OF REST, QUIETNESS AND TRUSTING CONFIDENCE IN YOU …?

            Wednesday, 3 October 2018 now at 8:07 pm.

            Father? HELP! I don’t know how to sort out and combine the books for The Family A True Story My Story. I wait on You.

            Thursday, 4 October 2018 at 3:08 am.
            One more day, O my Father! One more day to hear Your voice calling us to rest in You. One more day You are calling me to quietness and trusting confidence in You—the only way to claim strength.

            You know I am determinate, resolute to rest in You. So? I expect nothing else but! For You to be gracious to me. For You to lift Yourself up, that You may have mercy on me and show loving-kindness to me.

            You know my situation and condition with this body of mine. You know I am doing my best to be quiet, confident, trusting You, but!

            It seems to me I am not doing so. Sending that scary link about the monstrous threat to the USA? It just does not add up to trusting You.

            Anyhow? I did it—I sent the scary link to the three people in touch with me right now.

            One reaction? ‘But if it true…so what? Then we go to be with Jesus. No worries, ok? And be careful what you click on!!!’

            Father? Is that a reminder to rest, to trusting confidence in You, or? Is that a reminder for others to do so?

            Regardless, what does it mean to rest, to trusting confidence in You? Does it mean for us to bury our heads in the sand of ignorance, or?

            Could it mean for us to examine the matter intelligently in Your sight? Could it mean a warning from You that we are not trusting in You?

            FOOD FOR THOUGHT…?

            What about me, my Father? Is this a test of my determinate, resolute to rest in You?

            I know You are leading me all the way, yet! The question remain, “why am I hurting so?”

            O my Father! I’m beginning to see. Just now? I hear Your lovely voice:

            “TODAY is your DAY!” WOW! Where is that hurt and pain? GONE!

            I am on to take care of Your bountiful supplies You sent to me last night. Hahaha! HallelluYah!

            I must send this entry to those three lovely ones You have granted to me.

            Hey ye all? Don’t know if I make sense or not. Regardless? Father is in control of all my doings.

            No problems. No worries. Whether I make sense or not? It’s His business not mine anymore!

            On to my task with much gusto!

            Thursday, 4 October 2018 now at 9:11 am. Wow! It’s the 9th hour on this 10th month of this 2018 year again! Been working with my supplies and answering a few comments.

            I am so blessed with my supplies. It took this long to clean, cut, and put away most of them, but! I have still much to do in that department.

            So? On to the task. TODAY is my DAY!

            Liked by 1 person

          6. Lovely. ‘On to my task with much gusto!’ Haha Thank you for sharing 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

          7. thiaBasilia says:

            I’m having the time of my life! Joy inexplicable is here to stay forever! I’m sure this time.

            So glad to get connected with you. Thanks a million! TODAY is really my DAY! 🙂

            Liked by 2 people

          8. Awe! So glad you’re so full of joy and positivity. We all need more of that. 😊🙏🏽

            Liked by 1 person

          9. thiaBasilia says:

            Indeed! Blessed be His name! He’s drenching that joy on all of us! So glad you are so drenched with it! I can tell by your smile and your responses. 🙂

            Liked by 2 people

  5. foodzesty says:

    Great post Kally!!! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Kally says:

      Thank you so much for your support.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. foodzesty says:

        You are very welcome 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  6. utesmile says:

    Thank you Kally , this is perfect timing… I am just about going insane at my workplace. I have not learnt to let go there. At home I am fine. Work, I am too much of a perfectionist and it so much bothers me that I have no work /life balance. I am over stretched and I feel I am racing against time every day. I have a new place of work, ( not my choice) and responsibilities have doubled. I expect too much of myself and of others. I really need to let go. I shall read this article now every morning to help me through my day!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Kally says:

      Oh, a big hug for you, Ute. It must be so frustrating and overwhelming for you at your new job. Talk to someone at work about your work load, maybe to get some help before it all explode in your face and you have a meltdown. Maybe delegate some of the responsibilities away. If you need more advice, I’m always here for you. You can drop me an email at kally@MiddleMe.net to bitch about work 🤗

      Liked by 1 person

      1. utesmile says:

        Thanks Kally ! Trying to let go now…..

        Like

  7. DutchIl says:

    “Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” -C.S. Lewis

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Anonymous says:

    This is a good perspective for taking control of your life and work.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kally says:

      Thank you for your comment.

      Like

  9. vicklea says:

    I retired because I was tired of fighting these daily battles. God bless you in your continued efforts.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Kally says:

      Great that you have retired, Vicky. One day I shall be like you!

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Kally says:

      And welcome to MiddleMe!

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Good observations and advice. Where we get bogged down is the actual assessment of what is important. Where would one be able to know importance without understanding that which is temporary?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Kally says:

      Thank you for contributing to this post! Interesting questions. You made me think.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Awesome Kally!

    In other words “GET A GRIP!!!!”

    “Employees” are “associates”, NOT slaves.

    I have always advocated doing just a bit more than the Boss expects or asked for; but always to THY OWN SELF be true. {Get and HAVE a life outside work.}

    A worker ought always be worth “his” wages and PAID accordingly.

    Perhaps we can’t pick our bosses or assigned task; but as long as you accept the job; DO IT WELL.
    If your unhappy, it will be reflected in your work; find other employment.

    Have values; for example when I was still working I had a “BS” Factor: every job was worth the “BS” depending on the pay and opportunities for advancement. …If “BS” exceeded the potential and I couldn’t correct it; it was time for ME to move on.

    God Bless,

    Patrick

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Kally says:

      Very straight advice indeed, Patrick. No BSing and straight to the point. I always do my best and give my all in whatever I do. That’s me. Bless you and your family.

      Liked by 1 person

    2. thiaBasilia says:

      Hahaha! I call it, ‘either cook or GET OFF MY KITCHEN! That’s the naked truth. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  12. This is SO good and SO important! I’m so glad you are sharing your wisdom!

    Like

  13. Some very good advice here. I need to let go a little more with my difficult and “without a clue” clients. I do far too much work for far too little money because I’m “nice”.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kally says:

      Dayne, tell me about it! In the same boat as you. The only difference is that I have very nice clients who can’t pay much and I’m too nice to drop them even through my rates have increased over the years. The difficult ones, I dropped them like hotcakes no matter what they are paying. Not worth my time in arguing with them and selling my soul.

      Liked by 1 person

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