A while ago, we discussed about different kinds of colleagues you may encounter.The below is the continuance of that post and your contribution as well.
A.K.A The backstabber. He would smile the sweetest smile you ever seen, she would compliment your haircut (even though you haven’t had one in ages). They never meant their words and at the very first chance they get, they would throw you under the bus to save their arse or to make them look good.
Location: Sales, Marketing, Legal, HR
Identifier: Almost slithering up to you silently. If you observed carefully, you might catch the fork in between his tongue. Hsss….
Tai Chi player
He has the flexibilty that put your yoga teacher to shame. He can twist and he can turned, do backflips or cartwheels just to avoid doing work. He pushed his work around like you’ll push your dinner around when you are on a diet. He knows when to act busy and can sniff out a boss from 10 metres from his cubicle.
Location: Almost everywhere except commission based jobs like Sales
Identifier: Tracksuits or yoga pants a dead giveaway. Or he always start his speech with a “Hmm…”
He is never around but appears at the right moment when the biggest boss arrives. He tends to disappear into thin air when comes to work distribution.
Location: Especially during project management
Identifier: Leaving a trail of smoke behind him as he go “Poof!”
He is a quiet nerd, sitting at the end of the hall where cobwebs grew. Don’t worry about him as he loves the silence so that he can go on tinkering his gadgets. He always fall for the “damsel in distress” whenever the prettiest ladies ask him to help to move the water cooler bottles or fix their dying laptop.
Location: Technical Support, Engineering, Warehousing, Logistics, Accounting
Identifier: The last cubicle at the end of the hall
You’ve got to be friends with her if you are saving holiday funds. She pinches money in a good way and a fun way. Her conversations surrounded with where to get the best bargains and which store is having sales.
Location: Finance, Accounting, Receptionist
Identifier: The person who start pulling out coupons to hand around during lunch
She takes on anything and everything. Don’t mistaken her for Sugary Sweetheart. She is more proactive than anyone else in the office. She will aim for the toughest and biggest case. She will be the first to volunteer to be in the office basketball team even though she hates sports.
Location: Everywhere even not in her department, she can be found everywhere…
Identifier: Often the bosses’ pet…
The Sick Cat
She is a nice person, usually friendly and helpful, that is when she is around. You can’t help but noticed that she isn’t around all the time. She’ll have a mysterious illness that plagued her and causes her to take medical leave 3 days out of every 5 days of the week. Your bosses fear her and will never fire her to leave due to potential lawsuits. Her colleagues fear her due to potential viral infection.
Identifier: The pile of medical away chit on her dusty desk
She take selfie of her food, her desk, her newly issued laptop, even before the start of a meeting, she asked everyone to gather around on a Monday 8am meeting so that she can take wefie before the boss walks in.
Location: Customer Service, Sales, Marketing, Public Relations, HR
Identifier: Her weapon of choice – The Selfie Stick
She memorized all the office manual and regulations by heart. She is able to quote them backwards in her dreams. She won’t be hesitant to dish out Section 3.6 if you are late for a minute.
Location: Legal, HR, Receptionist, Boss
Identifier: You’ll see her hovering around the office floor to catch anyone who is doing anything remotely un-office like behaviour.
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(Please do note that this article is meant to be taken in a lighthearted way and is no intention to label anyone or diminish anyone’s personality.)