Relocating myself

I wanted to share this topic for a very long time even longer than MiddleMe was set up because I had so many people asking me why I chose to move away when I have everything. To give you the context: I was doing extremely well at work, I have a fantastic team who loves me and the feeling is mutual, I have a great bunch of friends and loved ones back home. I’m in a safe country with great career opportunities and growth and I’ll doing pretty well for myself among my peers. I’m staying with my family with all my bills, my housework and my meals all taken care of.

I had it all, so why do I move away?

Challenges
When an opportunity opens itself to me to move to a strange new country, the adventurous side of me couldn’t refuse. I want to push myself to the limits in my career and see how far I can go without the environment I’m familiar with. I want to be the pioneer among my peers to explore the depths of unknown and perhaps conquer it.

apple-758334_640Learning Experience 
This creates a whole new world in my career and personal life that I have not been exposed of and it is truly a lesson for me. Whether it is mingling with the locals and understanding how they work or me learning about myself for the first time. You see, personally, I’m always someone’s daughter, friend, sister but when I’m all alone there, I’m thrown into only myself. Yes, I took a deep breath and a big leap by moving there, not knowing anyone except perhaps a few of my colleagues who were going with me.

notes-514998_640Complacent
I felt I was already there so I shouldn’t fix what ain’t broken but somehow in my heart, I know that is not right. I’m still young with many years ahead of me. I’m getting too comfortable where I am and I wasn’t challenging myself enough. People around me kept saying I shouldn’t be greedy, I should be contented of what I already have and achieved, but it’s not about greed. It’s more about stretching my limits and see how far I can go. It’s about proving myself (and my family), I can survive on my own.

Survival 
In a strange country where I do not have friends and a whole lot of responsibilities to myself and my company who gave me this opportunity, I need to do more than merely exist. I need to exceed in a lot of people’s expectations and more. People who believed in me and present me the opportunity to relocate, I’ll need to prove them that they were right to choose me. People who didn’t think ill make it, I’ll need to prove them they were wrong.

I learned to open up my eyes a little more and my heart a little more to understand and accept the local’s culture. I learned to ask for help when I needed to set up my broadband so I’ll have the internet. I learned to force myself to read, write and reply everything in Chinese when back home, I’m so used to using English all the time. I learned to fix a blown lightbulb, a leaky pipe and cracks along my kitchen sink, a luxury I took for granted when I was back home because all I have to do is wait for dad to do all this. I fixed my own meal, order my own groceries and cleaned my own place, another luxury I relied on my mum.

file0001249487154Maturing even more 
In Singapore, we often take safety for granted so much so our government had to advocate and advertise “Low Crime doesn’t mean No Crime”. To give you an extreme but a usual sight in Singapore, we actually place our bags, mobile phones and even wallets on the McDonald’s table to reserve our seats before going to the counter to queue and place the order. And yes, 90% of the time, when we returned with our tray of food, the items are still there untouched. I used to be guilty of that.

No way I can do that in China. Whatever I put there will be gone in an instant! I need to keep my bags zipped all the time and have my backpack in front of me when I moved to a crowded area. I need to remove my earphones when I’m crossing the street in order to be alert of the oncoming traffic. I know it’s common in other countries but in Singapore, pedestrians have the way of right.

file0002033475306Cultural Expose
I now see through the eyes of a local and accepted their differences. In fact, now that I’m away, I missed their differences. Recently when I went back to Shanghai after leaving 6 months, I actually teared a little when I reached the airport because I felt I was coming back to a place I called home for two years. I watched the movies they watched, I sang the songs they sing, I ate like a local, I cursed in their slangs (by the way, they find it amusing when I did that) and the only thing I haven’t done is to spit the way they did.

Got to be humble
Yes, I may have gone there as a manager, however, when you’re in a foreign land, it’ll do a lot of good by eating the humble pie rather than strut your way into the office, thinking that you are bigger than them. That’s not going to earn you any respect and in fact, people will dislike you for your arrogance. In the first place, they are already wary of you being someone whose culture they probably couldn’t or haven’t phantom so by acting all big boss, you’ll just drive their defense up.

Nice on Paper
After all the above positive attributes, one thing that is most realistic one of all is how nice it sits on my CV, giving me an edge through the doors of Human Resources. What better way to prove that you are adaptable to new changes, gearing for challenges and constantly tries to improve yourself than to let the HR knows you have relocation experiences.

Would you give it all up and move to another place / state / country for the sake of your career? Share with us your thoughts below.

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95 comments

  1. It’s much harder when you have a family but I think if I was single and an opportunity arose I would grab it and I would move. Life’s too short not to make the most of new places, people and experiences.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Well, it really depends. I have had friends who moved with their whole family. Ultimately, you have to decide for the family as a whole is it good for them. I guess it boils down heavily on the relocation package that the company offers.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Of course. It depends on what stage of life you’re at, how old the kids are, how it will affect their schooling, so many things. But yes I’m sure there are many people who relocate quite successfully and make it work for everyone, particularly if the relocation package is attractive.

        Liked by 2 people

  2. Ahh… moving to better a career, way past my time, but in the day? Did it a few times and each time is a shock to the system; makes you get on the learning curve faster, jogs parts of the brain that have almost atrophied from little change. I think deep inside, beyond and below the fear, we all want to sample a new way of life. It’s the greatest adventure and you get to earn your way through, strengthening your sense of self-reliance. Yes, agree with you totally.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Certainly a big yes Once we are into job and look for moving up the ladder in career, relocation is the first challenge which one should accept gracefully. The nature of working conditions, Govt policies, and several others factors make you wiser and confident.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. O Kally, Kally! How real you are! In a different setup, I can totally identify with your experience one hundred percent! HaHa! Only you are young but, I was not when my Master chose to relocate me to this region of the world–talking about about an adventure?

    A seven years adventure so far! Amazing adventure at that! At least you learned & spoke their language–my tongue is not able to grasp this unique language–that in itself has been the adventure of my life by my Father’s side.

    Only the language of His love has avail me to communicate with these beautiful locals big time! Welcome! Welcome! they all welcome my smiling wrinkle face and tell me how beautiful I am! Haha! I look in the mirror & think, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder not in my eyes! I am sure that reading my first book is giving you a good idea of what I mean.

    Right now I am at the peak of the mountain looking down at the valley of death that we all must travel on. I am not only observing but also learning even more every day so.

    What a joy it is meeting you! Thanks, my beautiful young friend. 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

          • Ah! I missed your comment! I’m like your follower blogger MixBlog–Leland. I tell you? He is the best of them all bloggers, ’cause, like myself, he’s got age & experience over you all young beauties.
            He found me in your blog. He is now following me and I him. Fun, fun, fun. But like him, I am & has been passionate about computer tinkering for as long as he has.
            Anyhow, this new blog is a product of many months tinkering with my WordPress, Dreamweaver, Filezilla, Photoshop, Internet suppliers and my servers.
            So, the final product is yet to come. For I am still wondering why or where is the hold on my links–a confused net, that’s all in the working.
            Conclusion, when all gets to my top? I crash in bed and died for a couple or more hours. Wake up? Surprise–a comment from my Kally! Haha! What a wonderful development this is! 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

          • I do hope your website gets all up and ready 100%!! I’m so glad that Leland has found you through here. Good reads are meant to be shared everywhere!

            Like

          • Hi Thia, when I click Home button at the top bar, it gives me an internal error message. You might also want to look at your top banner, seems to be out of alignment compare to the rest of the page. Just my opinion! 🙂

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          • Yes! It’s fixed!! Yay!! You might want to think about having a mobile version as well since everyone is reading from their mobile phones and iPad. Just an idea!! 🙂

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          • Hi Kally, I’m really proud of the blog–it’s a Dreamweaver site that I have been working on for a while.
            In the process I wound up with 3 different versions of it each version in different folders but with the same index file. Phew! Talking about a mess to unrabble! I had to work hard at straightening out all those files! But at least the front page is set. I will be posting daily on it–so check it out. And thanks again for helping me out. 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

          • Yes, I have to do that, that’s the thing to do, been knowing about it for a while. Don’t know why the procrastination?
            Even so, away with procrastination! Dreamweaver 2014 is urging me to get to work on it!
            And now the renown Kally joins the clamoring?
            I’ll tell Leland all about! You all trying to get us respectable seniors to join the iPad generation?
            Well, either sink or swim. We seniors are good swimmers, Mobile? iPad here I come! Maybe before the holidays! HaHa! 🙂 love u!

            Liked by 1 person

          • That’s my girl! I think our good friend Leland is taking a break or don’t know why I have not heard from him?
            I’m working on that responsive site needed for iPads and such. I just started the tutorial again–I have done that number before, so, I’ll try it again. Practice makes perfect as you know it. 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

    • From state to state is a big move to me too! Although the language is the same, I wouldn’t say the culture or the accent or even the food can be different, according to one of my friend who moved from California to Washington. She misses the sun.

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      • It is a big move and it was a bit scary for all the reasons that you spoke of. For me though there was only a small culutral change to deal with and from one side of the country to another there was some language differences in the use of slang. It was a great experience. I wish more people were open enough to see that getting too comfortable kills your spirit a little. You have to be willing to take a risk. If it doesn’t work you try again!

        Liked by 2 people

  5. Relocation: A step forward in your life. I liked your post could relate to it. I have relocated a few times; for study and work however never outside my country. New place brings new challenges and make you a different (and hopefully better) person too ;). Different kind of people with myriad cultures teach you a lot and you come face to face with a side of YOU, undiscovered before.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Wow. Great post and wonderful writing. Moving to a new country can be an exciting and also a scary experience at the same time. I applaud and commend you on your courage Kally. 👍👏👏

    Liked by 3 people

  7. One of the things that was probably positive for you was moving away from where you were being taken care of by your own family – that’s a huge step in really becoming independent. I never had what you’d call a career with any kind of ladder to climb, so my moves were not based on jobs. The only time I did have an “offer I couldn’t refuse” – to go back to the USA as an assistant professor – I did refuse, ’cause I’d already moved from country to country one too many times 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Relocating is a big thing in anyone’s life. A married person has a lot more to consider when relocating than a single person. Kally, you are more apt to adapt to relocating than any other person.You have a personality that makes people stop talking when they see you come into the room. As long as you are relocating on this planet I am very confident that you will do very well. Please do not relocate to someplace like Mars because this world needs people like you right here.

    My relocating days are all over. I will not need to rent a truck when I leave here. I will be riding in the back of a long vehicle, maybe I will ask to have the lid left open with a mirror on it so I can see whats going on.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thanks for the vote of confidence! Don’t worry, I won’t move to Mars, Planet Earth still fascinates me plenty. Haha! Everyone bound to ride the long vehicle once in their lifetime, hopefully it is not end of the story but a beginning of a new chapter.

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  9. Relocating is a big thing in anyone’s life. A married person has a lot more to consider when relocating than a single person. Kally, you are more apt to adapt to relocating than any other people. You have personality that makes people stop talking when they see you come into the room. As long as you are relocating on this planet I am very confident that you will do very well. Please do not relocate to someplace like Mars because this world needs people like you right here.

    My relocating days are all over. I will not need to rent a truck when I leave here. I will be riding in the back of a long vehicle, maybe I will ask to have the lid left open with a mirror on it so I can see whats going on.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ha ha ha! That’s my Leland! Only you could have come with such suggestion! Mars? Why not the moon? I just woke up, only to find Kally’s encouraging comments and your outlandish ones! ha ha! What a treat? I think I’ll write about it! love u all! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I can relate to you very well, as I’ve chosen to move to different countries/places numerous times during my adult life. I’ve lived and worked in Asia, North America, and Europe (including the UK), as one of my biggest goals is to live in a different country every few years. That’s my favourite way to get out of my comfort zone. As you must know from experience, it’s not all fun and games (it can be frustrating and painful at times), but living in a new place broadens your perspective and accelerates your personal growth. Thank you for sharing!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Haha! Well worthy traveler! I believe there are many sacrifices you made to achieve this and I do agree that you learnt a lot more from acquiring different perspectives from different parts of the world. Kudos to you! Not many of us can do it, I don’t believe I can keep on relocating non stop.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. So many times the challenge of relocating is not just the difficulty of fitting into a new culture, or the hardship of leaving the comfort of one’s own shelter, but the fact that outsiders are often used as wage slaves in their adopted countries. Few warnings of this are available, so here’s one.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. This is an excellent blog, Kally, and the move is excellent for your work and soul. We moved to Cairo in Egypt and it was a hard location. Nonetheless, we learned so much about life, the things we take for granted in the richer nations and about ourselves. Then we moved the the US, my place of birth, and started all over again. Who knows what will happen in 2016. Hope it is wonderful for you. K xx

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  13. Thanks for stopping by my blog! I empathize so much with this post, as the reasons you listed are the very reasons I decided to move across the country for college. Hope all is well in your new environment!

    Like

  14. Kally, you write very well! Your post is filled with wisdom and experience. Got lots of insights. Moving out of our comfort zone is an opportunity to experience and learn new things. New adventure! Thanks! : )

    Liked by 1 person

  15. I relocated because so my son and I can follow my husband & finally be a family. I did have a good career too in my home country NZ but I have to give it up. Please check out the old post on my blog when you have time thanks. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  16. For a fixed period of time, I have moved to and lived in another country for my career and for the sake of our children. While each time was a great learning experience, I was happy to return home again. We were forever changed by our experiences and have become more tolerant individuals. Great post.

    Liked by 1 person

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