No Place For Abuse

Singapore is known for our low crime rate. I have always felt safe living in Singapore so much so that I always have taken safety for granted. Hence, it is shocking to read abuse in the workplace in a first world country.

I never condone abuse and harassment in general especially at home and at the workplace because that is where you spend the most hours in and both places should make you feel safe.

How can anyone perform their best and be productive when they are threatened all the time?

When I come across articles like this, it angered me because so much more that companies can do to protect their staff and not allow such incidents from occurring.

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From the video provided by the article, you can tell that the abusive behaviour has happened before and other co-workers are numbed to such behaviours.

Although this is an old video, it shows that there’s more need to be done.

If you are abused in your workplace:

  • Don’t condone it (don’t even find it harmless or funny)
  • Don’t ignore it (your bully will keep coming back)
  • Report it (to whoever needs to hear it)
  • Be relentless on reporting (keep on talking about it until you see action being taken)
  • Be brave to stand up against the bully
  • Don’t walk away
  • Don’t crumble under threats or pressure
  • Don’t be blackmailed
  • Be prepared to move on (time to find a new job if your bosses and HR ignore you. It’s not worth your time in the company)

I’ve been bullied in some of my previous workplaces and I have seen bullies abusing my colleagues.

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I stood up to them and made my stand very firm.

I told them I cannot condone such behaviour towards me, I cannot respect bullying at/around me and I won’t work with bullies.

Bullies come in all sort of shapes and sizes. Some pulled ranks with me. Some threaten the security of my job. Some even use emotional or psychology blackmailing tactics. Something is wrong when you don’t stand up to someone who deliberately hurt you.

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If my company don’t or won’t support me, I’ll still stand my ground and report to the relevant authorities.

You want me to do my job right, I’ll do my best in my work but please take out the buzzing bees at my ears so I can be at my top form, serving our customers and concentrate on bringing profits for the company.

If you have read the article, please share your feelings with me in the comments below.

For similar articles, you may want to look through these:

What Happens When You Don’t Take Responsibility At Work
Whisper: My Father Belittles My Job

Whisper: I Slept With My Bully


 

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31 Comments Add yours

  1. No one bullies me, either. If they are not swayed by my words and actions, they will be introduced to a very wide public- and put to shame.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Kally says:

      Good that you protect yourself.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. michnavs says:

    This is so timely Kally…and who would really expect bullies exist in the most professional environment? We (I) thought it only happens among teenagers but well now, so many people are coming out and telling thier stories….

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Kally says:

      There are plenty of articles and Media shining on school bullies but so far and a few talks about workplace bullies. Many of the school bullies grew up taking the same kind of behaviour into workplace and picking the weaker ones, the silent ones as their victims. You’ll think that adults will learned to defend themselves but sadly that’s not the case.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I am don’t like the photo with the woman holding the knife, I think it is very threatening.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Kally says:

      Just to get the point across 😊

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Abuse happens everywhere. Even in so called first world countries. If you’ve watched “The Devil Wears Prada” or “Horrible Bosses” then you know what I’m talking about. Psychos are not confined by boundaries. According to a study, there are more psychopaths in America than anywhere on Earth combined.

    Several years ago, there was a Singaporean girl caught poisoning her labmate while studying at Stanford. https://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/stanford-grad-student-poisoned-classmates-cops-article-1.2171414 Also, incidences of maid abuse is not uncommon in both Hong Kong and Singapore. Economic development and appropriate mentality does not go hand in hand ironically. The saying first world country but third world mentality applies.

    If you have a chance to travel to Europe, America or Hong Kong, you might be shocked at the sight of homeless people. The more advance the country, the more indifferent people become. In Singapore, even retirees work. Forced to work because pension not enough to cover living expenses or too bored staying at home?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Kally says:

      Answering your question. In Singapore, I believe it is both. We don’t have a lot of activities for the elderly to spend their time after retirement. And many don’t use internet. Some elders I spoken to, they prefer to rely on themselves rather than to get handouts from their children because Singapore is really an expensive country to live. While some says, the total income in the family is not enough to support their lifestyle. While Singapore don’t have homeless people, the government will house them and it’s illegal to be homeless. There’s more to do to include the elderly into our society like volunteering. Even my dad who has retire, has so much time on his hands but he choose to stay home all day.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you so much for the insights.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Kally says:

          You’re most welcome !

          Like

  5. equipsblog says:

    Good for you Kally. Bullying doesn’t work in government (look at the U.S. shutdown) or on the job.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. This just blows me away. When I worked in an office environment I allowed banter with respect to the individual. When the lines were crossed, we did check the line for new rules. If by chance there are situations of ganging up on an individual, there needs to be a management change for a better environment. keep your posts going as there is wisdom to be found.

      Like

      1. Kally my friend, you touched upon a nerve here.
        Some years ago I was the Operations Manager of the company’s Flagship and largest store.
        After the most successful year in both the stores and the company’s history; I was promised a huge raise. The Store General Manager was promoted to a NEW {in process of being built Flagship store; and the replacement was a women KNOWN by reputation for desiring to work only with females in EVERY store management position.

        The very day she took over she called me into her office, closed the door and then directly told me to “dust of my resume; that I wasn’t wanted here anymore. I only work with women!”
        I suspected she wouldn’t last long and decided to keep doing my job and wait her out. THEN we got a new District Store Manager, {NEW TO THE COMPANY} who on his second visit to the store said that in 30 days he would make an inspection of every store under his supervisory responsibility. At the time I was doing the work of three top level managers; and in addition to being the operations manager {a full time job is stores even MUCH smaller than mine}; I was responsible for all commissioned sales departments; and all the stores Leased departments as well.

        I accepted the challenge and worked 30 days of very long hours. Thankfully the employees were on by side and preformed every task I assigned to them perfectly. {We even measured the distance between the sales tags for uniformity}.

        This was just before thanksgiving {for those who may be unaware; typically Retail stores to do 1/3 or more of their annual sales in the six-week period of Thanksgiving through the end of the year.

        As Operations Manager I was also responsible for ALL of the various stockrooms which were jammed with tubs of merchandise to the ceiling. Backroom were even difficult to walk through. I had EVERY tub tagged with the name of the merchandise, organized by category and date of being advertised and the date it would be on sale for easy reference.

        Unadvertised merchandise was separated from future add goods; with complete inventory of what was in each and every tub {THIS WAS A HUGE UNDERTAKING, BUT i HAD BEEN WARNED BY SOME OTHER MANAGEMENT THAT “THEY ARE OUT TO GET YOU FIRED.”}

        The day of the inspection came and sure enough MY areas of responsibility were the first to be checked. {I had responsibility for 20/25&% of the sores departments.} I KNEW they could find nothing wrong with any of them, including the stockrooms. OH! By the way this was late on a Friday afternoon.

        So after an hour or so I was called to meet them in a small hallway near the freight elevator {the space was used by our DISPLAY STAFF for all there excess Display stuff}. I was responsible for THEM too and forgot about this small hall. {MY FAULT}.

        This is the first place they the District and the Store Manager took me too. Then He took me on a tour of the stockrooms. He asked who had organized and tagged all the tubs; and I told him that it was done under my directions. NEXT he took me unto the sales form and begin to REAM ME OUT for the display area not being better organized. {I took it without comment}. Next he took me back unto the sales floor and began SHOUTING {literally} about “All of the tubs of merchandise; over a thousand of them; in the stock rooms and told ME that I PERSONALLY was to ship every-one of them back to the main warehouse by noon on Monday. THIS WAS BOTH SUPID AND EVEN IMPOSSIBLE GIVENT THAT THE MAIN WHAREHOUE WAS CLOSED OVER THE WEEKEND. “If I failed I would be terminated on Monday.”

        I knew that this was IMPOSSIBLE. I had spoken with the Corporate HR Manager {a women that I thought I had a good working-relationship with} about my raise earlier in the week and was told that that not only was I not getting the HUGE raise recommended by Old Store General Manager; I was not getting ANY RAISE.

        So I went to tour store HR manager {who also reported directly to me}, and ha d heard the shouting all the way to her office; gave her my keys and left. WITHIN 60 DAYS THET HAD HIRED THREE PEOPLE TO DO THE JOBS I HAD SO SUCESSFULLY DONE.

        So I gave in to the Bullying. NOT something I’m proud of or recommend for anyone else.
        God Bless,
        Patrick

        Liked by 2 people

        1. Patrick: Your account of events is like any other that would be found in any retail operation. You were in the wrong place at the right time. Count all the experience as a plus, go on about your business and try not to get caught up in trying to do the Best Job. The “Lady” General Store Manager was planted to set you and the former Store Manager for a rude awakening. You have survived the ordeal and that should be the lesson of he day. Great Job. John

          Liked by 2 people

          1. Agreed, but I opted to get out of Management and back into sales. Ended up in Sales Management.

            God Bless and Thanks,
            Patrick

            Liked by 2 people

        2. Kally says:

          Thank you for sharing your experiences with us. I’m proud of you for standing up for your rights. I don’t take bullying at all means. Either I retaliate or I wait it out, depending on the situation. You definitely shown them your capability and it’s their loss for not treasuring you and letting you walk. I’ve done pretty much the same as you before. I excel in my job and when they don’t appreciate despite chances given, i walk.

          Like

    2. Do you think that doing the right thing is Bullying?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Kally says:

        Doing the right thing is not bullying. It’s how you treat your coworkers through your words and actions.

        Liked by 1 person

    3. Kally says:

      I do hope that nobody has to tolerate bullying in the workplace ever.

      Like

  6. Excellent points and article, completely agree! ✨

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kally says:

      Thank you and welcome to MiddleMe!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Absolutely, happy to be your blog reader! ✨

        Liked by 1 person

  7. zadi says:

    You have so many interesting posts,thanks for the follow and like , we keep in touch

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Kally says:

      Thank you so much, Zadi and welcome to MiddleMe!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. zadi says:

        Thanks 😊

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Well written. Your words call the readers’ attention to the need to make the workplace free from abuse and bullying. You provided great testimony to engage and question such behavior instead of being a quiet bystander. Have a great week!

    Like

  9. Dragthepen says:

    Very important that you have brought attention to a wide spread problem in the work place. It starts at the top and then it flows down. people ignore this as people whining and causing problems

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Kally says:

      Precisely. Often abuse get ignored because the HR and management don’t know how to deal with it. They choose the easy way out by closing an eye and a ear and turned the other cheek.

      Liked by 1 person

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