I mean my ancestors probably are from China many many many years ago. Both my grandparents are born and grew up in Singapore, both my parents are born and grew up in Singapore, me and my sister are born and grew up in Singapore too. What is our race? Chinese. What is our native language? English and Chinese. What is our nationality? Singaporeans.
But what irks me sometimes is that I can mistaken for being a Chinese from China. It’s like my nationality doesn’t matter. It’s like you are deem as from Africa just because of your skin color. Or you are seen as either from America or UK, just because you are white and English spoken. It just made no sense. Particularly now that the world has become global and as long you have the means, you can travel almost to anywhere and live anywhere.
If you ask why I am not proud of my roots, I am! I am proud that I am a Singaporean, my roots are tied to Singapore. I never step onto the soil of China until much later in life when I need to go to Shanghai for work. Is Singapore very much different from China?
Definitely! Singapore is a tiny weeny dot comparison to a lot of countries. Despite its size, we are first world country too!
The dilemma comes in when people asked if I am a Chinese and they get confused when I said I am a Singaporean or when I said I am a Chinese from Singapore and I’ll have to explain myself. This kept going on especially when I am overseas regardless whether I’m in China.
I also counted my blessings that as inconvenience as it seems, it is a conversation starter among strangers and it arises curiosity enough for them to want to understand more about my country. Because of this, I have befriend many foreigners especially the Chinese who are intrigued about my thoughts, my upbringing and my influences. This has led to many business opportunities and offers as they see me as a bridge to the western world.
So not every situation in your life is purely negative ones. If you are able to turn the situation around to your advantage, you’ll be able to balance a win-win solution out of it. I could have grumbled and avoided those I deem ignorants but I didn’t, instead now I have friends in China I could count on and I could stay with whenever I visit China. I also get to understand my colleagues from China and the way they handle certain things in certain matter, this way I avoided misunderstandings and confusion as well.
Have you encounter a situation where you turned it around to your advantage? Share it with us here!
MiddleMe 
I do not like labels. A label whether it’s a nationality, a religion or a gender or social class does not define who you are. You by your own traits and standards define who you are.
I’m of Scottish and Irish descent. I’ve never been to the British Isles and I probably never will. I’m an American and proud of it and my ancestry does not define me as a person even though I’m proud of my heritage.
I define who I am and that’s the way it should be!
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Well said!! People love to label me due to the fact Singapore is pretty small and a lot of people still mistaken it either to be a city of China or Malaysia. It’s not, it’s a country by its own right.
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I have zero tolerance for ignorance. Singapore was a British Colony until the 1960’s. People need to read history before making assumptions. Oops, there’s that word again……
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Haha.. This week is all about avoiding assumptions and judgements.
That’s also why our laws and jurisdiction is followed closely to the British system.
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It’s a good legal system. Ours is patterned after it too.
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I have a funny question and would love your perspective on this: is it better to let a jury or a judge decide on the fate of a man? I had this debate with my friends years ago and we couldn’t come up with a right answer.
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I’ve served on a jury as it’s forman. A good juror will strive to come up with a fair verdict. Because of my experience, I’d prefer a jury trial. During vior daire your attorney has the right to question and challenge a prospective juror, you can’t do that with a judge. Even more reason for a trial by jury.
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Great insight to the question I posed. I’m not sure I’ll get used to a jury but I have been a fan of watching America court dramas and found it fascinating. Over here, it’s all boil down to the judge and only him have the deciding power.
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A right to a trial by jury in a key part of our judicial system which is protected by our constitution.
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Thank you for enlightening me! I have learned something today!
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Dear, anytime! I do enjoy our conversations so very much. 😆
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Me too!!!
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Thanks. Your reply means a lot to me.
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Such a thought-provoking post, Kally. And being a person of Chinese (Malaysian) descent who isn’t born in China (never been there yet too), I get people expressing surprised when I say my family are from Malaysian. Generations of my ancestors grew up and lived in Malaysia – I’m sure at some point far back they originated from China, but my family tree is certainly rooted in Malaysia in the present day.
I do refer to myself as Chinese-Australian. A lot of people I’ve met in Australia are well-traveled with an open-mind set, and so most of the time they don’t assume I’m from China – it’s usually those who are from Malaysia, Singapore and other Asian countries that often think I come from China.
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Haha!! What an opposite of mine. I had to explain to a lot of people and mostly people from the States and Europe that I am not from China, I am a Chinese but I’m from Singapore and get a bewildering look from them like they are trying to process that thought in their head. I guess it’s the same for the Chinese Malaysian, the Indonesia Chinese and the Thai Chinese.
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The only people in Australia I remember who think I’m from China are those who have always lived in predominantly-white suburbs or in rural areas. I’ve been to some of these places and get stared all the time, and when I mention my parents are from Malaysia, they often ask, “Are you Malay?” 😀
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Hahaha!! I can so identify with you but seriously, Malay?? You had me in tears.
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I have come across quite a few people who go: “Malay-sia…Malay. So you must be Malay”. In a way it’s sort of logical – but also very incorrect stereotype at times. People assume that nationality is the same as race, which is not the case for a lot of us.
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Yup, I think you got it worse off than me!
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My conversation with random strangers, usually goes a little something like this.
Them: Where are you from?
Me: Proud Canadian
Them: No really, where are you from?
Me: I was born in Canada. I’ve lived here my entire life.
Them: Are you sure your not Jamaican or African?
Me: No
Them: well what about your parents? Grand parents, Great Grand parents? Spiritual Ancestors?
Me: no answer
Them: well you don’t Speak like a black person. You sure your black?
Me: Look at my skin. I am definitely black.
Them: Do you smoke weed? Grow marijuana, cause most black people smoke weed.
Me: No.
You get the picture. People will always make up assumptions, all you can do is smile and move along from the ignorance 🙂
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Haha!! A good one. Love the convo example. I get that too!! Like they will ask me if I speak English and why do I speak English. It’s the same when I’m in china and they are amazed that I speak Chinese when I tell them I’m from Singapore. It’s sometimes hard for them to wrap their head around the fact I’m native bilingual and always have been since young.
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I face that too almost every time in Australia. The most common question in Australia is “Where are you originally from?” My response depends on my mood or how the person asked.
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So what’s the most sarcastic reply of yours?
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I tell them I am originally from Ipswich, a city here.
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A good one! Haha!
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Reblogged this on Lost Dudeist Astrology.
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Love that you’re Singaporean, Chinese people don’t just live in China. People in the UK don’t just live in England, there are Irish, Welsh and Scottish people too.
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Precisely!! I think it’s very backward to think only the English lived in England, only the Scots live in Scotland and only the Irish live in Ireland. We belong everywhere we chose to build our lives.
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Well put. Our national identity never tells the full story. I love living here as there is a multitude of different nationalities in close proximity, not just Scots, Irish and Welsh but there are Indians, Chinese, Pakistanis, Arabs and Jews, to name a few. Chinese New Year brings a lot of colour and fireworks to Newcastle and has been celebrated for years. Muslims and Jews have been living side by side for decades and racism never enters the equation. I love that people get on, for the most part, without any trouble. You’re always going to get a minority of idiots who hate blindly.
Hope you have a good weekend.
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Thank you for your comments. I’m glad you live in such a lovely area where multiple races coexist. Have a happy weekend!!
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I did Kally, thank you and I hope your was good too.
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I have been to Singapore many times…and I must say I love the place …and yes I have seen many Chinese looking people who I am sure are Singaporeans…labelling them as Chinese-Singaporeans is somewhat frustrating…but I must say I am truely glad you are proud of your nationality.
few years back I have to apply for a board exam in our country..I almost didn’t make it to even applying because my middle name is foreign sounding middle name add to that, that I look like a foreigner too…I have to go through tedious process to pove them otherwise..
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I’m so glad you love Singapore! I love it too although I’m pretty bias having that is my country. Haha! But now I’m residing in Malaysia, loving being a foreigner in a different country and learning it’s culture.
What?! You need to prove you are from your own country? That’s incredulous.
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Very well written. It is strange even though we are now progressing more and more into globalised world some people just do not change. What we all need is a global mindset.
Thanks and regards.
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Thank you! I’m glad we are aligned in our mindset. We need to move forward towards globalization.
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This always surprises me, that people say these things to someone they just met. Honestly, it never occurs to me to ask someone their heritage. I am a mutt. Scottish and Greek logs in my woodpile, who knows what else? Never found it to be relevant to anything. I always want to just get to know who someone is. If they have cultural traditions they practice, I find that interesting, but we are all the same, when it gets down to it.
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Oh, I get that all the time whenever I travels. People will ask me where I’m from and if I’m a Chinese from china. Even strangers came up to me to ask me before when they hear me speak in fluent English or Chinese.
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So crazy!
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Hola Guys! Thanks for the supportingg me 😊Please check out my insta : candystrawberrycupcake . please I need some of likes . I also follow you 💟💞👍😊😊😊😊
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Haha.. I don’t have an Instagram account yet.. Shocking, I know, right
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I do. nivek5913. you should get one. Its a great way to see lots of pictures. i follow the BBC on it and they put up lots of short videos. My brother and son are on there too and we share pictures all the time.
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I’m a new starter at social media. WordPress, Facebook and Twitter kept me busy throughout the day already. Perhaps I’ll try Instagram one day.
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I used to do Facebook but my account was hacked twice so I deactivated it. I love Twitter and WordPress.
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😍😍😍😍
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Hello Kally
I loved this post and thank you for visiting ChattyKerry, I was born in America,half Irish/half Hispanic but my ancestors are much more varied including someone from south east Asia. I have Scottish accent and I look Scandinavian. Ignorant white people share their racist opinions with me until I tell them I am Hispanic, Hispanic people cannot believe that I am despite my maiden name being Ortega. My black friends were surprised that I had North African genetics. Finally, I love to sneak up to Arabic speakers and wish them good morning in Arabic. They don’t expect it in Texas and certainly not from a blonde wearing a mini-skirt. There is more about us that is the same than is different.
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That’s quite true. We are all the same despite our roots and cultures and we got so much more to learn from each other!! Thanks for dropping by and a big welcome to MiddleMe!
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Thank you so much for your warm greetings, Kally (we will be cousins way way back) 🙂
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After all, I believe no matter where we are and who we might be, we are united as humans. Thanks for dropping by and leaving me a comment!
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Thank you for this beautiful post Kally. It makes me know you better. You are definitely proud of your nationality which is great. As someone has said, the world is fast becoming a global village, and what matters is not someone’s geographical origins but the content of one’s heart. I love all nice people like you no matter where they come from.
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Thank you so much!! One should always be proud of where they came from but still remember that we are moving toward globalization.
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Exactly. We are all one.
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When I was in school , I was bullied by some classmates , they continuously made fun and taunted me…I was badly hurt 😞later on I talked to my seniors and teachers regarding that….I got to know that they bullied bcz they thought I m proudy….I m very reserved in nature thats true…😯
I knew I couldn’t change my nature…however I tried to clear the doubts…and it ended pretty well😊😊
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I’m glad it ended well for you. Bullying should not be tolerated and you did the right thing by talking it out with your seniors and teachers. Bravo!!
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Hi Kally – I’m English and it does annoy me when people from other countries refer to us as Brits. Most of us from the British Isles I’m sure think of ourselves as either English, Scottish, Welsh or Irish. It doesn’t make us dislike one another, in fact we are stronger, I think, for each feeling we are unique. We only ever think of ourselves as British when we are being invaded, or when we have to produce our passports. Of course, other ‘Brits’ may disagree!
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Haha!! I do hope that British will never be invaded! It’s a lazy and ignorant way to group people as one identity when we come from all over the world.
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Great post – I love how you turned frustrating stereotyping into opportunity and seized upon it!
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Haha!! Thank you! It’s important to try to turn every negative situation around into a positive solution, this way, it can benefit all.
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Just like Singapore, Hawaii is quite the melting pot!! We have people of all kinds of ethnicities, and when any of us locals head to the mainland or away from the islands, we are considered “Hawaiian” even if that isn’t necessarily part of our personal heritage. We all take pride in being “Hawaiian”, because it’s where we grew up and what we know. Just like you are Singaporean, even though that isn’t your ethnicity, it’s part of you!
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So good to hear you’re proud of where you came from just like me!! Heritage is very important and that’s where your roots and culture came from.
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It reminds me about my surroundings. 90% of my students are Chinese descents, but they consider themselves in accordance to their homeland..for example, I’m from Jakarta..I’m from Surabaya, My dad is from Palembang and my mom is from Kalimantan, most of them just say they’re Indonesian and only minority who speaks Chinese at home (mostly Mandarin or dialects) and some speak English..but great majority speak Bahasa Indonesia at home and among friends and they get Mandarin at school along with English and Bahasa.
And maybe for some foreigners, Indonesian Chinese is unique as they had two names and many took from Javanese/Sanskrite names for their surnames.
Like Tan surnames, it can be Tanuwijaya, Tanusetya, Tanusoedibjo, Tanjaya, Tanueve, Tanasal, Sutanto, Tanubrata
Wong becomes Wongso, Wangsamulya, Wangsajaya etc
Ong can be Ongkowiyono, Ongkojoyo, Ongkowidjojo
Oei becomes Wijaya, Winata, Wirata, etc.
Lim becomes Halim, Salim, Taslim, Nursalim, Limanta, Limanto, Limanjaya, Liman, Kaslim, Rimba, Wanandi etc
Or many of my students have a very Buddhist names like Avalokita, Virya, Viryandika, Paramitha, Visakha, Wiryaka, Katthyananda, Ananda, etc..
Some also retain their original Chinese surnames especially the younger generations.
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Wow!!! Thanks for educating me on your heritage! It’s an eye opener. I didn’t realize that most have two names.
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Also common among Chinese in Thailand 🙂
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Similar to other countries, Chinese descents are divided into two…totok (purely or recent immigrants) and peranakan (more than two generations or local born), their cultures are also distinct each other. While in Indonesia itself, Peranakan culture is far more dominant than Totok, as I read and see by myself, and most Malaysian Chinese peranakan had already been assimilated to mainstream Chinese culture, am I right?
Chinese culture influence is very vibrant in such cities like Medan, Batam, Pontianak, Singkawang, Jakarta, Tangerang, Pekalongan, Semarang, Lasem, until Surabaya. In Pekalongan, Lasem and Semarang, you can see Chinese influence in their batik…motives and colours. 🙂 And Semarang itself has the largest temple and Chinatown too.
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I think I reply too much here..hahahaha..
And the last thing is also Peranakan cuisine. Peranakan cuisine in Indonesia and Malaysia as well as Singapore has many similarities, but also distant differences particularly in Java. Peranakan cuisine is centered in Semarang, Central Java. It’s influenced by Javanese style so that’s why it tastes sweeter but spicy at the same time.
Sorry if my replies are little bit far from the topic 😀
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No no, it’s alright for your comments to be long. There’s no restrictions in MiddleMe at all. Thank you for taking time and effort to write about your country! It’s really fascinating.
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Hehehehe, just sharing as this article is so attractive till I wanna comment much more. 😀
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Perhaps I may have inspired you to do this topic as an article of your own!
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When I’m traveling overseas I always hope people mistake me as being from England or Canada! Hehe, but that’s just because everyone hates Americans! I do have several friends with Indian heritage who get this a TON though here in the US.
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I guess the next time someone ask me the same question I should replied with “Oh, I’m a Venusian! We are trilingual, English, Chinese and mind language.” Lol!
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ahahahah yes I love it!!!
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When I first married my husband, he would proudly tell the world he was Italian and I would tell him, no you are an American and should be proud of that fact. Fast forward to coming home from a trip to Italy (which was delightful), in the plane my husband start calling himself American and has never gone back.
There is a big difference between your ethnic background and the country of your birth but you should not have to choose between either when describing yourself.
That being said, sometimes describing my ethnic background has been a good conversation starter.
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Definitely a very good conversation starter, never fail to open a stranger up to ask more questions.
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I suspect it’s more complicated for a Singaporean of Chinese descent vs. a Chinese-Canadian like myself, since Canada is known worldwide to be a country made of aboriginals, immigrants and descendants of immigrants.
Canada is just so much further away from China.
I don’t spend much energy trying to explain to people anymore. And I tell them flat on that I’ve never been to Asia yet.
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Great to have you here, Jean! I guess it’s because Singapore is so small and not really heard of by a lot of people that they think we are a part of Malaysia or China.
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Asia get muddled in the minds of many people. Even for myself, I haven’t figured out the cultural differences between Vietnam and Cambodia.
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The cultural is big differences especially how the two countries’ different histories shaped their people’s lives.
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Both countries are beautiful in their own rights. Perhaps one day you might want to come over to Asia for an adventure!
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Hi Kally, being a Singapore citizen by birth it is natural that you’ll have a greater affinity for Singapore. US citizens whose ancestors migrated from different countries are all Americans ..right? It is good that you look upon this point as a conversation starter.
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Thanks!! I guess it’s how people look at where they come from and where they call home. To me, I still call Singapore my home. Anywhere I’ve been is just a temporary stop until I go home one day.
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Great post, and really interesting to read some of the comments made. For my part, I’m English (and from Liverpool, which is a very unique part of England) and have been fortunate to work in several other countries so I can fully understand your frustration!
I’ve worked in Kuwait, Libya, Dubai, Abu Dhabi, and Germany. I think it is a great eye opener to travel and especially if you are working in a foreign country.
You are right to be proud of your heritage, and you seem to be a perfectly well balanced intelligent person. Keep up your great posts!
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Wow!! You are a well relocator! Thank you for liking my post and I truly admire your courage to venture out to so many countries! Thank you so much for your encouragement! I’ll keep on writing and sharing.
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Thanks very much!
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Love this post. My parents and grandparents are from Ghana, West Africa. I was born in the United States and lived here all my life. One thing that I have found troubling with people and their concerns in labeling or identifying others based on race or ethnicity is how they treat you depending on your ethnicity/background. Like previous commenters have said I prefer to not hold on to labels and instead get to know people and their background before assuming anything. The only assumptions I could make of a person is what continent they most likely originate from. Beyond that, I cannot assume.
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We all lose out when we formed our own judgements and hence, lost all opportunities to meet new people with open minds and arms.
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Thank you, Crystal for dropping me a comment!
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Happened to me too, when I said I was Chinese…and they asked me if I came from China. They did not know Malaysia and asked if it was near Hawaii, probably because the name sounded like Polynesia…and after a lengthy explanation about Sarawak and Borneo where I come from, it dawned on them and they exclaimed, “Ahhhhhh!!!! It is in Singapore!” Ah well! That was in the 80’s – I think it is not so bad now – the world has grown much smaller.
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Hahahaha.. I’m so glad I’m not the only one in this situation. At first, I thought I’m the only weirdo who encounter this.
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Too much of ethnocentrism can result into unbearable division which brings underdevelopment. We need to avoid it in order to enjoy peace globally.
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Very true! Insightful words of wisdom.
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There are so many variations on people’s ignorance and assumptions. I get a bagfull because I’m of very mixed heritage and look vaguely foreign wherever I am, I’ve lived in many countries and speak a number of languages fluently. “Where are you from?” is a very fraught question for me – actually one of my first blogposts was about it 🙂 The point is, multicultural would truly be the only honest label, but it doesn’t satisfy people so they usually end up with “but where were you born?” and decide for themselves that’s where I’m from! which is pretty funny because I was packed off to another country at the age of 9 months and have no memories whatsoever of the place!
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Haha! From a well traveled person like yourself, I guess where you are from is where your heart is.
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exactly!
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I have travelled to around eighty countries in my life. I have lived and worked in many of them. This includes Singapore, Borneo and Hong Kong. I just love to immerse myself in the huge variety of cultures, languages and cuisines that cover our planet.
My father is from Yorkshire and my mother was from the Highlands of Scotland.
If somebody asks me where I am from, I often say that I am from Planet Earth.
To follow up on that, if they are being small-minded, like some of the people who have questioned you, instead of asking them which country they are from, I ask them which planet they are from.
Life can be such fun.
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Haha!! That’s a good way to put across Planet Earth!! Love it! Thanks for making me laugh and envious that you have worked in so many countries at the same time.
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This conversation reminds me of an attempt by Mark Bellison (The Invention of Lying) to explain “the Man in the Sky” to totally ethnocentric people. Finally in total frustration he said, to the question of race, “He’s multi-ethnic, he’s made up of all races!… and now can we carry on, folks?” I don’t like travelling, hence I don’t, but I come from Brittany, a conquered country with its own ethnicity, language, yet now totally immersed in French since the conquest. I now live in the south-west corner of Canada, in the Lower Mainland and there is so much ethnic variation here that nobody even notices racial differences anymore. People from all over the world live here, all mixed, some in their own communities but very flexible. Richmond has a high Chinese population; Surry and Abbotsford, East Indian and Sikh; also Mennonites from Russia; French Canadians in New Westminster and etc., My parents, mother Breton, Dad more French, were not nationalists and kids were taught to see the world as one planet, not different races. All was best, segregation and judgment based on race was evil. Here it’s simply impossible to know who’s from where, and assuming is often cause for much laughter. A while ago while in a computer store, I assumed, by his looks and accent that my clerk was from Pakistan. Oops, he was Persian (Iran)… and a short moment of embarrassment quickly laughed over. We have black people who could be recently from an African country, or they could be from the USA (which is just a few miles to the border), so can’t know that either. Best for me to think of “all of you” as fellow travellers in space, on a planet designated as earth and possibly surrounded by countless other races we may get to meet some day and thus broaden our understanding of acceptance!
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It does sound frustrating but I’m happy you are staying positive and using it to your advantage. Some people are just ignorant. I feel sorry for people like that.
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Me too! There are people who I manage to convince them to open their mind and there’s another group who just totally shut their hearts out.
Thanks for dropping in. Welcome to MiddleMe!
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This is a topic close to my heart cheers, where are your contact details though?
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Kally, how wonderful that you could use that negative, and turn it into a positive! Learning about others’ cultures, and how they think is always a great thing!
Thanks for being a faithful reader, and commenter. I appreciate you!
Melinda
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Hey Melinda!! How’s your weekend so far? Always look forward to your post and in my heart, I love your favorite color!!
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Aww, thanks, Kally! You’re so sweet!
YAY!! We need more purple power in the world!! 😀
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Yeah to purple power!!
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😀
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Every day I deal with ethnic stereotypes, stereotypes regarding sexual preference and the most destructive stereotypes regarding mental health and mental illness. The only way to deal with them is to refuse to accept them — and the best way is to turn them to your advantage; especially when you use your gifts and skills to learn who you are as a person, which ultimately transcends all stereotypes.
I can see that you do that.
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Thanks, Robert. I can see you doing your best to deal with such ignorance and turn the situation to your advantage if you can. 🙂
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And so now I find out, I already read this post!! {Blushes in shame} Dad gum senior moments!
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Hahaha! You’re always welcome to read and reread every of my post, dear!
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😉
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goodness, this has inspired a great conversation among readers!
I have a friend who was born in the Philippines, yet she calls herself Chinese.
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If your friend’s race is Chinese, then she’s a Chinese regardless of which country she’s born in. 🙂
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You’re a Baba nyonya… 🙂
(I think we have talked about identity before)
In many cases it is a choice.
You are a Singaporean. Period.
Happy (Chinese) New Year 😉
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Haha. You’re right. I do have a choice. Better to be able to choose than none. Happy Chinese New Year!!
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Kam siah. 😉
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I am also Chinese but not from China I was born in England, both my parents are also not from China but from Hong Kong.
I just got back from Marrakech in Morocco where you get hassled by people trying to sell you things more than any other country Ive been to. EVERY single day I was there all I kept hearing was “Hello China”, “China?” “Ni hao”. I got sick of telling them Im not from China Im from England. One person even accused me of lying. Next time if I do go back there I will to wear a T-shirt stating “Im not from China”
What also annoys me is when someone asks where I am from, I reply England and then they asks where my parents are from and I say Hong Kong. They then talk about Hong Kong and start asking me questions about Hong Kong, did they not hear me say Im from England?
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